Contributed by: Victoria Tarantino
Get to know Victoria here
Story From: New York
I grabbed my pink journal and scribbled the word “LOVE” in big black cursive letters encircled by doodled hearts <3 <3 <3
Right below I questioned “how do you define love?” I stared at the inked question blankly. I read it over and over as I patiently waited for the answer to pop into my head and flow onto the paper but instead my brain flooded with more questions over analyzing and overthinking this definition.
As I struggled, I grew increasingly more frustrated with my case of writer’s block around a topic I thoroughly enjoy exploring. The little voice in my head coached, come on Victoria you love talking about love. My instinct was to shoo away the little voice but then I realized she has a point. I spend so much time talking about love and relationships with my friends but as soon as I was faced with sharing my vulnerabilities I desired to retreat.
I felt the silver cage around my heart swing closed and lock with a twist of the key.
I sighed and I flipped through my copy Pablo Neruda’s “Love Poems” for inspiration, that I purchased for myself as a Valentine’s Day gift. I focused my energy on immersing myself in the poems and painting lavish love scenes in my head. After realizing that it wasn’t working I tossed the the pink and gold pocket sized book aside and paused. I returned to my journal and decided to pour out all of my love related issues that were preventing me from opening up.
As I put my pen to paper, I found it much easier for me to write about the hurt, pain, suffering, and hardship that love has caused me rather than reflect on the beautiful positive moments and experiences it has awarded me.
I was looking externally to place the blame on love when I really needed to look internally and reflect on the quality of love I have been giving myself and the framework that I have created for love. Instead of continuing on this downward spiral of negativity, I shimmied myself towards a place of curiosity around what I could do to improve this narrative for love I had been crafting and disrupt the comfort I’ve felt in maintaining it.
The little voice in my head came back, but this time I listened and wrote out everything she was asking: How can I cultivate a healthier relationship with love? How can I continue to improve self-love? What would it look like if everyone went through their days from a place of love? How can I return to falling in love with fleeting moments and experiences? How can I approach love from a fresh perspective? How can I change the narrative I’ve crafted? How can I let go of past assumptions of love? How can I open my eyes up to finding the beauty and love in the monotonous routine of the day to day? What might I fall in love with every day? The voice continued to question on and on.
I thanked her for reminding me that I don’t have all of the answers. I have to advise myself to pause and not take everything so seriously. I encourage myself to approach love from a place of curiosity and excitement for what is to come.
It is okay to allow myself to let go and receive what is around me rather than worry about what’s coming next or what has happened in the past. I am working towards constantly approaching love from a place of curiosity and am on the path towards a healthier relationship with love. It’s nowhere near perfect, but is definitely a work in progress towards bringing in a new perspective. When I am present in the moment, I can feel the love for myself and the gratitude for what I have even if it is fleeting. I aspire to embody an open heart through curiosity for love.
So, how do you define love?
This is Aida, Founder of 365 Days of Love <3
First, a big thank you to the inspiring woman Victoria for sharing her story and reminding me to take a step back to reflect on how do I define love, what are the questions that come up and am I running from something (escaping from some personal vulnerabilities)?
Second a big thank you to YOU for reading this and taking the time to care for yourself, your heart and your life. If you enjoyed this and have a story or thoughts on love that you would like to share please get in touch (button below). We have 342 more articles to share and we hope to hear from you!
LETS INVEST IN LOVE ONE STORY AT A TIME TOGETHER.
With Lots of Love,