It’s a Saturday afternoon and I sit behind the screen supposedly working but in reality I am daydreaming of love as I have the warm sunlight touch my face and the smooth waterfront fill my eyes.
I imagine how beautiful it would be if the person I would love (or currently love), would be next to me right now.
I imagine how beautiful it would be if instead of working (even though I love my work), I was talking and laughing with him.
I imagine how beautiful it would be to unfold the layers of a person one coffee at a time, one Saturday afternoon at a time.
But as I daydream about this the questions also arise:
When will I meet this person?
If I have met this person, is he the one for me?
How will I know he is the one?
Is there such thing as the one?
Once I know he is, how do I keep him forever?
Is there such a thing as a forever love?
and how does one guarantee it?
if I never find it or find it then loose it, can I truly be happy?
As this inner dialogue between me, myself and I happens I recall my reading earlier this morning from the 7 Spiritual Laws of Success, specifically the chapter on the Law of Detachment. The Law of Detachment says that in order to acquire anything in the physical universe, you have to relinquish your attachment to it. This doesn't mean you give up the intention to create your desire. You don’t give up the intention, and you don’t give up the desire. You give up your attachment to the result.
The book reminds me that attachment to things is truly just false security. It is fear based and love has no integration with fear and thus cannot have attachment or conditions. It can only be found and laid in uncertainty (the uncertainty that is based in love not fear)
And to answer my own question about being happy with or without him, true happiness cannot be conditional.
True happiness comes from an empowered heart and not a conditioned outcome. And the ironic thing is the second you truly live with that mindset everything you want will just come.
The fulfillment of security and happiness only once you find your partner is an illusion. The best possible outcome is that he/she amplifies the best version of you, allows you to shine more, makes space for you and pushes you to unfold yourself a bit more everyday as you do the same for him/her.
Dependency, conditionality and guarantees cannot be part of true love, freedom and happiness. We will never truly know what may happen but what we do know is that uncertainty will always be there. So to make room for growth we need to become grounded in uncertainty. The uncertainty of not knowing what will happen because you are no longer dependent on false securities and illusions.
As Deepak says “relinquish your attachment to the known, step into the unknown, and you will step into the field of all possibilities. In your willingness to step into the unknown, you will have the wisdom of uncertainty factored in. This means that in every moment of your life, you will have excitement, adventure, mystery.”
So as I go back now to my slightly colder but still delicious coffee, I go back to it a bit more grounded in uncertainty, a bit more comfortable and with a heart that can breathe a bit deeper knowing that I have it all within me and the path to all possibilities is found in the uncertainties of life. I hope you do too.